i don't plan on having that self control this summer
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
He better not be in your backpack
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Randomize
