I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
