Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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