im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
