Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
