dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize
