Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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