like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
