you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
