So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Randomize