I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
