Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
