Do you still have your period?
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Randomize