two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
