Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Randomize
