We need to rekindle our bromance
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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