Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Randomize
