but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize