She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
