Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
