You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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