idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
