Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
