I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
