direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
My penis needs a shock collar
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
