I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Im part way to drunk.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
