The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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