she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
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