I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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