i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
