you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Randomize
