how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
