Can Purell be used as lube?
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
