I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i jhust puked up my retainher.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
