So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
