D3 body, D1 cock
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
