i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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