Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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