the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
How's work?
Spinning.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Randomize
