Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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