i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
