Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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