Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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