She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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