How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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