It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
