Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
