I'm lost and stupid without you.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
