this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
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