Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize