Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
